You can tell a lot about a person by looking at her luggage. Having spent a lot of time in airports, I’ve become an expert at luggage profiling.
Parents with small children carry a ton of extra gear when they travel. Backpackers stuff everything into one (ginormous) khaki pack. College kids have more technology in their pockets than you can find at an Apple Store. Business folk carry a laptop in one hand and a Starbucks cup in the other. And opera singers pack a bunch of “extra” ballgowns… bet you didn’t know that.
So how about you? What’s your travel type? Take my quick quiz:
1. When they unzip your bag at customs, you blush because you know you packed too many…
a. handcrafted Aboriginal beads
b. diapers, LEGOs, Spongebob toys, remote control dinosaurs, doll clothes, pack-n-plays, pipe cleaners and hamster pellets
2. When you empty your pockets at security, you find:
a. a folded street map of Vladivostok
b. crumpled receipts, loose change, bubble gum wrappers, and one yellow sock
c. your wallet
d. something with rhinestones on it
3. When buying luggage, you ask:
a. “Does this have a compartment for my collection of collapsible hunting knives?”
b. “This suitcase isn’t big enough. Do you have a steamer trunk?”
c. “Do people still buy luggage?”
d. “Does it come in pink?”
4. When the airline attendant tries to check your carry-on because there’s not enough space in the overhead compartment, you reply:
a. “Can you check it all the way through to Abu Dhabi, or do I have to re-check it in Amsterdam?”
b.”It’s heavier than I am. You’ll never get it off this plane.”
c. “But it fits right under my seat!”
d. “Je m’excuse! Je n’ai pas compris, madame. Parlez-vous français?”
5. When the lady at the check-in counter tells you that your luggage is “overweight,” you reply:
a. “This one bag contains everything I need for the next 189 days.”
b.”Yeah, my suitcase always gains weight on vacation.”
c. “It only weighed 16 ounces at home. You must be leaning on the scale.”
d. “I’m carrying the full orchestral score of the greatest opera ever written. Can’t you make an exception? The world needs this music.”
If you chose mostly A’s, then you’re a SUPER NOMAD. You can travel the world with a few handy items and the clothes on your back. I would be just like you, except that I wouldn’t know where to put my extra ballgowns. But you should check out this post about how to pack for the Western Sahara.
If you chose mostly B’s, then you are a BLOATED FLOATER. You have a lot of baggage, and I mean that literally. Are you traveling with young kids? (If so, you’re doing great! Keep up the good work.) Are you setting sail for the New World with all your worldly belongings? (If so, you’re doing great! Keep up the good work.) But if not, then you’ve got way too much stuff! Before you park your U-Haul at the airport, think about what you really need. Organize. Simplify.
If you chose mostly C’s, then you’re a CARRY-ON CAPTAIN. You know how to fit everything into a compact space. You breeze through security with no extra hassle, and you disembark a full thirty minutes before that poor family with the twin toddlers. I envy you.
If you chose mostly D’s, then, congratulations! You are a true JET-SETTING DIVA. You understand that luggage has to be both functional and fabulous. Your suitcase might be heavy, but at least it’s pink. You are a savvy traveler with a sense of dramatic flair. You should probably order this passport cover by Sicura.
Now that you know your luggage personality type, you’re ready to board. PanAm image courtesy of ScreenRant.